Chapter 179
1417words
He gasps for air as he stands behind the podium, everyone looks at him whispering to each other and I run up to him on that stage knowing damn well I probably shouldn't "hey hey! Talk to me" I whisper in his ear as everyone else just sit by and watch.
"I... Need..." He gasps tugging on my shirt he's having a panic attack "Hunter what is it?!"
"Get... Me... Out!" He says as he continues struggling to breathe. I pull him away running with him to
the nearest bathroom. We burst in and he rushes to the sink trying to splash water on his face but nothing he's still gasping
"Hunter you have to calm down" I rush to him as he collapses to the floor "look at me!" I demand "hey! Breathe like this" I slowly breathe through my mouth "come on you can do it" he's trying but he's failing.
We're both on our knees in the bathroom "Joe...." He struggles to get my name out "h-help me" he grabs his chest. He needs a distraction to calm him down, I think for a second but I can't come up with anything "p- p- please" he struggles more
Without thinking I pull his head towards mines and I kiss him, pushing all my air into his lungs I wrap my lips around his and he welcomes it. As we kiss he slowly starts to breathe again I can feel the air coming from his nose. After a minute I pull away and he collapses on my lap.
Hunter Mathis is my ex, we were together for two years and four months ago he dumped me with no explanation. I moved on or at least tried to, but every time I'm at least a step towards moving on I find myself three steps back at his beck and call. Hunter suffers from glossophobia and today he had a speech to do in front of the whole school about what it's like to suffer from something everyone thinks is just a little bit of anxiety. Ironic right? He has a panic attack while doing a speech about having panic attacks.
I really should be getting on with my life but I loved him once and I don't think I'm over that. I manage to sneak him out of school and drive him back to my house where I put him on my bed and I've been taking care of him since. It's been four hours, I know he's fine I just need him to wake up.
I sit in my chair along side of my bed almost dozing off when Hunter's body moves, I quickly sit up as he comes back to. He grabs his head "wh- where am I?" He asks stuttering
"My house" I reply
He looks over at me "Joe what happened?" He's so lost
"Well during the assembly today in the middle of your speech, you had a panic attack and I saved you"
He sits up "I remember" rubbing his head he continues "how bad was it?"
"Well not too bad I took you to the bathroom and you panicked it out there until you passed out" "Oh god" he covers his face with his palms "what else happened?"
I hesitate but I have to tell him about the kiss "I didn't know how else to calm you down without having to.." I stop hinting at what happened
"You kissed me"
"Only because I had to!" He's going to find a way to play this "trust me if there were any other way I'd do it" when we were together and Hunter would have his panic attacks I'd just kiss them away but this time it was just a last resort
"It's ok, you did what you had to do"
"I called your dad, he said he'll be here soon" He smiles "thank you"
"You're welcome"
"No seriously thank you for all of this, you're so nice to me and I've been nothing but a jerk since we broke up" he has been
"Nothing I can't handle"
"You shouldn't have to" he slowly gets out of bed
"You really shouldn't move" but he does anyway coming towards me and kneeling down between my legs as I sit in the chair "what are you doing?" I look down at him as he's on the floor in front of me
"I'm the biggest jerk ever, I never realize when I have a good thing until I lose it" his eyes are so sympathetic and sad "you were the best thing that ever happened to me Joe and I let my insecurities get the best of me and I ruined us"
"You blamed you breaking up with me on insecurities?" I shake my head
"I'm so sorry Joe. Even after I hurt you you were still there for me, it's four months later and you're still here for me. I don't deserve that"
"Get off the floor" I try pulling him up but he doesn't budge
"You probably hate me and you didn't have to do what you did today but you did it anyway, that has to stand for something" his crooked smile always gets to me
"Don't try and justify what I did, any nice person would do it"
"But only you knew what to do because you know me more than anyone" unfortunately "Hunter just say thank you" I roll my eyes
"This deserves more than a thank you" he gets off of his knees but bends down to be at the same face level as me he moves in to kiss me
"Nope" I push him away and stand up "you don't get to suddenly realise I'm what you've been missing. I'm no one's second mistake"
"You weren't the mistake Joe, I was. I was the asshole who couldn't see what he had" I chuckle "right"
"Joe" he moves closer to me "tell me there's nothing there and I'll leave" he starts to caress my shoulder "tell me you want me to stop and I will" he moves in gently placing his mouth on my neck kissing it softly "just say the words stop Hunter and I'll stop" I can't! I know I can't!
And he knows I can't! I would fight him but what's the point no matter how in denial I get I always knew I couldn't resist him.
I pull his head from my neck to my lips. I kiss him with so much strength that we stumble a bit. He picks me up and I wrap my legs around his waist, the burning feeling as we passionately kiss each other in the middle of my room makes me numb. I've missed his lips, for four months I tried to get over how good being with him felt and I couldn't. He puts me down and I tear his shirt off, I missed his strong arms around my body so tight and the feel of his bare chest against mine.
The kiss deepens and we're nowhere near stopping but the doorbell rings cause me to jump "don't stop" he continued to kiss me and for a moment I didn't want to but the bell rings again three times this time
"It's your dad" I pull away "I have to get it"
"Joe please I want to be here with you" he begs sadly
"Yeah well we don't get what we want" I grab his shirt and toss it to him "get dressed and I'll get the door" I walk away. "Mr. Mathis" I answer the door
"Hey Joe how is he?" he walks in
"He's fine. He just woke up" we head to my room. "Dad" Hunter greets him as we walk in
"How are you feeling?" His dad asks
"I'm better Joe took care of me" yeah our swollen lips and red faces show how well I took care of him
"Thank you Joe" his dad turns to me and I smile "come on let's get you home"
"Can I have a moment with Joe dad, I'll meet you in the car" his dad nods then leaves. "Tomorrow's Saturday"
"I own a calendar"
"I mean if you aren't doing anything maybe I could come over" "Not a good idea"
"Joe you can't deny what happened" I don't reply "fine, but this isn't it I'm going to fight for you
Joseph Chance" he walks over kisses me on the cheek then leaves. I'm a fucking idiot.
