Chapter 13
777words
"You look terrible," Mila says bluntly when she visits one evening, setting a container of homemade stew on my counter. "Have you been sleeping at all?"
I shrug, pushing food around my plate after she serves me. "Not really."
"Have you heard from either of them? Damon or... your mate?"
"Damon texted once to check on me. Nothing from Ivan." I try to ignore the pang of disappointment this admission brings.
"Well, there's a reason for that," Mila says, her expression turning serious. "Ethan says Blackwater's been under attack. Rogue wolves, more organized than usual. They've had three border breaches in the last week."
I sit up straighter, suddenly alert. "Is everyone okay?"
"Some injuries, but nothing fatal so far." She studies my reaction. "You're worried about him."
There's no point denying it. "Yes."
Mila reaches across the table, taking my hand in hers. "Luci, talk to me. Really talk to me. I've known you since we were pups, and I've never seen you like this—not even after your parents died."
The genuine concern in her eyes breaks something loose inside me. "I don't know what to do, Mila," I whisper, my voice cracking. "Every day it gets worse. This... emptiness. Like part of me is missing."
"That's the mate bond," she says softly. "It's not meant to be denied."
"I know." A tear slips down my cheek. "But I can't accept it either."
"Why?" Mila asks, squeezing my hand. "What could possibly be so terrible that you'd rather live like this?"
I hesitate, the secret of the curse heavy on my tongue. I've never told anyone outside the family.
"Luci," Mila says, her voice gentle but firm. "Whatever it is, carrying it alone is destroying you. I can see it. Your wolf can feel it. And I'd bet anything Ivan can too."
"It's complicated," I say weakly.
"Life is complicated," she counters. "That's why we have pack. That's why we have mates. To face the complications together."
Something in her words strikes a chord. "What if... what if accepting him means hurting him in the end?"
Mila's eyes soften with understanding. "Is that what you're afraid of? That you'll hurt him?"
I nod, unable to speak around the lump in my throat.
"Oh, Luci." She moves to my side of the table, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "Don't you think he deserves to make that choice for himself? Whatever you're carrying—this burden, this fear—maybe it's not yours alone to bear anymore."
"I promised," I whisper. "Family secret."
"Some secrets are too heavy for one person," Mila says. "Especially when they stand between you and your mate."
I lean into her embrace, tears flowing freely now. "I'm so tired, Mila. Tired of fighting it. Tired of missing someone I barely know."
"Then stop fighting," she says simply. "At least talk to him. Tell him why you're afraid. He's your mate, Luci. The Goddess chose him for you specifically—not just anyone, but him. Don't you think there might be a reason for that?"
I've never thought of it that way—that Ivan might have been chosen for me not despite the curse, but because of it. The idea sends a shiver through me.
"What if he can't help?" I ask. "What if nothing changes?"
"Then at least you won't be carrying this alone anymore," Mila says. "And believe me, there's power in that—in sharing your burdens with someone who cares about you."
She holds me while I cry, years of fear and loneliness pouring out. When I finally calm, she wipes my tears with gentle fingers.
"Promise me you'll think about it," she urges. "About talking to him. Not necessarily accepting the mate bond, just... letting him in. Even a little."
"I'll think about it," I promise, and for the first time, I truly mean it.
Mila smiles, relief evident in her eyes. "Good. Now eat your stew before it gets cold. You're too skinny."
I manage a watery laugh, picking up my spoon. "Yes, mom."
As we eat, Mila tells me about her day at the bakery, about the latest pack gossip, about anything but mates and curses and impossible choices. But her words stay with me, echoing in my mind long after she leaves.
Maybe she's right. Maybe Ivan deserves to know the truth, even if it changes nothing.
Maybe I don't have to face the curse alone anymore.
