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The stench of alcohol hit me,making me nauseous.
I pushed him away."You've been drinking."
He sniffed unconsciously."Oh,last-minute dinner with client."
His said it so naturally,as if nothing had happened.
Noticing that I was apparently down,he apologized sincerely."I'm sorry,missing such an important day."
If I hadn't seen it myself,I'd have believed him.
I dug my nails deeply into my palms,trying to stay calm,but tears betrayed me.
Ethan,alarmed,wiped them away."Emily,what's wrong?I swear I'll never miss another one of your big moments."
That night,I turned my back on him,ignoring him for the first time.
The next day,my long-awaited wedding dress arrived.
I'd been thrilled for this moment,but now I felt only nothing.
The clerk,seeing me holding the dress indifferently,asked,"Ms.Harper,aren't you going to try it on?"
I did,but it was far too big for me.
From wedding jitters,I'd lost weight.
The clerk,embarrassed,said,"There's still time—I can fix it."
I shook my head."No need."
What's the point of fixing something that doesn't fit?
I remembered seventeen-year-old Ethan,overjoyed when I finally agreed to be his girlfriend after two years of pursuit.
He made a ring from a blade of grass,slipping it onto my finger,promising to marry me,to make me the happiest,most beautiful bride.
He closed his eyes,smiling,imagining me in a wedding dress.
But after learning his betrayal,I recalled the earlier signs.
When we were picking out the dress,Ethan’s eyes were glued to his phone,barely glancing up.
He laughed at messages,his attention on whoever was texting.
I danced in front of him in the dress,but he ignored me.
After I called his name once again,he frowned,annoyed at the interruption.
"Choose whichever you like.Don't worry about me."
His dismissive words stung,as if speaking to me wasted his time.
Noticing my hurt expression,he forced a smile."My Emily looks great in anything."
It felt like more dismissal.We didn't find a dress,and his attitude had me sad for the rest of the day.
He shut off his phone,apologizing."Sorry,work stuff.If you didn't like any of those,I'll keep shopping with you,for as long as it takes."
I believed him then.
Today,he was supposed to join me but bailed again—the second time in two days,right after his promise.
Somehow,I ended up outside his office.
In the past,I'd have rushed in to show him the dress.
Now,I turned to leave,feeling defeated.
By chance or fate,I saw Rachel arm-in-arm with Ethan,exiting the building.
Ethan's focus was on her,missing me just yards away.
I followed them.They got into his car.
Rachel sat in the"exclusive"passenger seat he'd reserved for me.
Ethan leaned over,buckling her seatbelt for her,their lips inches apart.
I became tense suddenly.
Then they kissed.
A knife seemed to pierce through my heart,the pain unbearable.
Clutching my chest,I followed them.
They entered a café.
I stood across the street,watching their every move through the window as if I was hurting myself deliberately.
The weather mirrored my mood,it started to rain.
I had to run into the cafe to seek refuge.
The moment I opened the door,Ethan looked up,locking eyes with my drenched,pathetic self.
