Chapter 24
1255words
I hadn't been sleeping properly all week, not since I'd left Scarlett down by the lake. I still had no idea how she had gotten home, and by the time I had returned, the sun was rising, and she had been nowhere in sight. I panicked, of course. Cursing myself for leaving her alone in the middle of fucking nowhere. But by some unknown miracle, she was safe, and Adam was none the wiser.
I hadn't spoken to Scarlett since, or at least not in any capacity that mattered anyway. But it wasn't like there wasn't anything left to say; Scarlett had made it pretty fucking clear she wasn't interested. So I was respecting her decision, or trying to at least. But, of course, I didn't agree with her. There was no way in hell she could be so cold; she wasn't like that, despite what she wanted everyone to believe. She was probably one of the most heartfelt people I knew. Yet, she had pushed me away without giving a real reason. So until she came clean, I was keeping my distance for now.
I gave up on sleep around seven AM and headed into School... on a Saturday. Despite my reputation as the school 'bad boy', most of my teachers loved me. None more so than my music teacher, Miss Gauge, who had given me a set of keys to the Music studio, enabling me to work on my songs wherever I wanted without being interrupted.
The Recording Studio had been given a surprisingly high budget compared to the rest of our crappy school. The dock fitted out with screens, computers, about a bazillion knobs. So that even four years down the line, I still had no clue what half of them did. There were high-quality speakers, recording equipment, both audio and video. There was even a mini-fridge, stocked to the brim with energy drinks. The booth itself was half the size of the school gymnasium. Fitted out with sofas, writing desk, drum set, keyboard, lockers, the best microphones money could buy and several TV screens.
Setting down my guitar case on the sofa, I shrug off my leather jacket. I had been working on some new songs over the past few days, mostly personal draft pieces. Creating lyrics, discovering the tune and pairing it with my acoustic guitar.
I retrieve my beaten-up notebook from the band's locker, leaving the key in the door. I turn to the most recent entry, titled 'The girl next door'. The page was a mess of scribbles, and several lines had been crossed out. On the connecting page, I had sketched the Scarlett.
She was wearing nothing but my tee, our bang logo on the front. Her hair was messy like she'd just been fucked, and her small fingers fisted in the fabric of her tee, pulling it down to cover herself. Hence, her over-exaggerated curves, making her breast and her hips pop out. I had drawn a sexy garter tattooed on her thighs, although in reality, it didn't exist...yet.
I sighed, folding the book over, so only the writing was visible. It was definitely one of those songs I'd never pitch to the band. After all, it was about Adams sister. Yet, for the life of me, I couldn't put it down or the countless others about her I'd been working on.
I set the notebook down on the desk, hooking the pencil behind my ear, before going over to unzip my guitar. The guitar was simple in itself, the wood stained white and several scratching and dents marking its varnish.
I brought it over to the writing desk, taking my pick out of my wallet before settling back down in my seat, positioning the pick between my thumb and fourth finger, and then clearing my throat, setting my fingers up in C Minor. Strum. Before checking each string. Tuning a few as I go. Strum. Good, everything was in tune. I skip the vocal warm-up, wanting just to get stuck into my music.
I start the song in C minor, G, string slap. D, E major, string slap. Then repeat before bringing in the lyrics.
“You've been driving me crazy,
Don't pretend you don't,
From the moment you kissed me,
I've needed you,
Nothing else will sustain me,
Yet now I'm alone,” I sing as I switching between chords—a small instrumental gap before I continue with the second versus.
“Now you’re with another guy,
It's killing me to see,
I can give you everything, (He will never be)
I'll be all that you need,
He wants to tame you,
While I can set you free.” freestyling the last two lines. I stop playing the guitar and grab the pen from behind my ear to quickly scratch it down. My writing was scrawled and pretty much illegible to anyone else. I starting humming, tapping my foot on the ground as I chewed the end of my pencil, Thinking.
“It’s good”, A familiar voice comments, making me jump. “It's arguably your best work; I can really feel the emotion in your voice” I turn around, feeling like I'd just been caught wanking. Miss Gauge stood in the dock, peering at me through the wall of glass.
“I didn't know anybody was listening”, I admit, awkwardly rubbing the back of my neck. “It's still rough work, not something I would really be able to use.” Miss Gauge walked to the doorway, placing her hands on her hips.
“Loki, this kind of writing cannot be taught. Your singing from the heart, something upcoming artists struggle with. It's supposed to make you feel raw, emotional and entirely exposed,” She insists, her passion seeping into her words. “I've never heard you write something quite like it before. It needs to be heard,” She encouraged.
“I don’t know. It's not something the band would usually sing. It just feels too personal,” I admit, my leg bouncing nervously.
“I agree, which is why it should be a solo piece. Just you and guitar, It will feel more authentic. Who knows, maybe if you sing this for your mystery girl, you might win her back?” Miss Gauge suggests, giving me a small smile.
“Probably not. She's made it clear she doesn't want me,” I declare. Why was I being so honest? Probably because I had nobody else to talk to, and she had just heard some of my most personal thoughts.
“Girls often say things they don't mean and push people away as a way of protecting themselves. If you show her this, you’re most vulnerable side. Then, she will know she can trust you,” Miss Gauge advised.
“What if she sees all this and still turns away?”
“That's the risk you have to take,” Miss Gauge says sadly “it's what life is. You put yourself out there with the risk of getting shut down. It’s scary as hell, but the rewards can be great,” she smiles, turning to leave.
“Thank you”, I acknowledge, making her turn. “For the advice.”
“Anytime, my door is always open,” She nods before leaving. I smile after her. The weight on my chest seeming to lift slightly. There was still hope for Scar and me. I just had to do something that terrified me. How I was going to pull this off, I didn't know. She had to know it was about her. But I couldn't let Adam find out unless I came clean and destroyed our friendship. Great. This was going to be a fucking disaster.
